Child loss took away so much of me.
A large part of me died that day, too
Our STORY
NUMBNESS OF BEING
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Getting up on the following morning felt unreal, both Sarah and I didn’t really sleep, maybe we catnapped at the best. We looked at each other wondering what to do, who to talk to, will anyone get in touch with us? We just didn’t know. A complete numbness filled our every being and disbelief was present every second.
Later in the day, the police phoned us up to explain the next steps for them and how they will be taking a back seat as they were totally satisfied that baby George past away peacefully from SIDs and that everyone involve did everything in their power, he let us know we would only hear from them again if the coroner felt they needed to. The officer was very kind and sympathetic in his words and we felt that he was able to empathise with us. He also informed us that we would be receiving a call from the coroner’s office within the next few days, to let us know what to expect and what would be our next steps.
Our issues started when speaking to the coroners department, the liaison officer began by saying the right things and filling in a few gaps. It was when she suggested on occasions items of clothing have been destroyed or lost, I began to panic, ‘we only wanted George's bedtime blanket, he will not be able to sleep without it’ I replied to her, she told me that she would make every effort to track the blanket down and get back to me. She let us know it would be fine to sort out the funeral, we told her what we had in mind for him with a date and again she assured us that would be fine. At the end of the conversation she told me she would text me her number so I could get in touch with her if we had any other questions.
The day after came and still no text or phone call, no way of contacting her, we had time to think and wanted to ask lots of questions. I searched through paperwork, the internet and anything I could think of, I could find but nothing, still we were waiting to get her promise text. Finally I phoned up the police to ask for any help, they was kind enough to contact her office and get her to forward her number to us. At first we was successful in contacted her, it may have taken a number of calls, sometime they were answered by her office and sometime redialing until a reply but contact was there.
With the go a head for George to be buried, we called our local parish and arrange for the service, our deacon and friend, Paul along with the parish council Linda, was able to help with anything we needed. The next stage for us was to talk to the funeral directors, without a doubt they all were a great help to us with every stage, nothing was too much trouble,
George was taken to Manchester for his autopsy and we were assured that he will be back in our arms before the weekend, so he could lay at rest ready for his funeral. The corners liaison officer let us know that his blanket was with George and would be returned at the same time. We were also asked about his tissues samples and what we wanted to happen to them, we took a lot of sole searching and came up with answers.
The weekend came and still George wasn’t back, we tried again to contact the corners but again nothing, we left messages and still nothing. We were finally told it would be a couple of days before George would be back, this was due to the weekend. We was starting to worry, what if any more delays, have they lost him, will the funeral directors have time to get him ready, no-one had any answers. The funeral director again helped us and told us to put our mind at rest as he will be back and they will have plenty of time for him to be with us once more and the funeral will go ahead as planned. We later found out it was due to the corner’s liaison officer booking the transport to late in the day for the return journey.
As promised George was returned and we was able to see him one last time, he looked so peaceful as if he was just sleeping. However his blanket wasn’t there, just a simple thing, all we wanted was for him to have just one thing from us that he loved and that couldn’t happen anymore. I tried again to talk to the corner’s liaison office and again nothing. We was quickly losing faith in her was looked for other solution that didn’t involve contact.
We have since talked to Snowdrop, who has many meetings with the police and corners department to try and correct these issues. We hope in our hearts that no-one else have had these problems.
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